I had heard the stories about birth… mostly about the pain. People tell you these things and you think you are prepared.
I was so eager for the moment I had any sign of labour; I was actually quite excited. Of course, I didn’t know how it was going to go, no one does. In my head I had pictured every imaginable scenario. Setti (my husband) works in Auckland so I was more than prepared to make the phone call, “Babe, it’s happening”. Luckily it started on a Saturday and Setti was by my side throughout the whole process.
I had experienced reduced fetal movement on Friday evening. My midwife told me to come in for a check up on Saturday afternoon. We got sent to Waikato Hospital for monitoring and the machine started showing regular contractions. Was this it? Or, were these those “Braxton Hicks” that are often discussed in every online forum? The doctor said she could check what was going on down there. I thought, “sure, why not?”. She then offered to do a process called a “stretch and sweep”. I had no idea what this would entail and thought again, “sure, why not?”. I don’t think my midwife was too happy about this because she said it was unnecessarily interfering if my labour was already progressing naturally. In hindsight, if I had known more about it, I probably would have declined the kind offer.
Oh boy did things escalate from then on. The contractions continued into the evening, rather close together (about every 5 minutes). I have a mild bleeding disorder so I needed to make sure I delivered at the hospital. This was in the back of my mind throughout the initial stages of labour. I was thinking to myself, “when do we go to the hospital?”, “what if I go too early?”, “what if I don’t make it in time?”. I think these questions are on most minds when in labour, especially first-time mothers. It’s not something that can be planned so it’s kind of hit and miss. For us, it was definitely a miss. My midwife told us to head to the hospital when the contractions were three minutes apart and 60-90’s in length. We had the three minutes going on but the contractions were regularly 50s long and not getting any longer. Thank god for technology, my contraction app was a life saver.
My birth crew came over to my house at about 10 pm on Saturday night. This included my hubby (who was already with me) my mum and my sister-in-law. We made the call to head to the hospital at about 11 pm. I had been regularly contracting for about six hours at this point. The pain was already excruciating and only getting worse. You don’t think it’s possible for the pain to be any more painful but then your body goes and proves you wrong. My midwife met us there and quickly checked to see how I was progressing. “Sorry Anj, you’re only about 2 cm dilated, you’re going to have to go home.” OH MY. WORST NEWS. Go home? How can I go back home? I feel like I’m dying and need to be in hospital. Ha. Nope… so off we went… back home.
The next few hours are a total blur. We were meticulously timing each contraction… waiting for them to get longer. 1am…2am…3am… nothing was changing except MORE PAIN. Poor Setti was trying to be helpful but we also knew he needed to rest because we had no idea how long this was going to go on for. I was telling him to sleep but was also screaming every 2-3 minutes so poor thing probably didn’t get any sleep. I think the whole neighbourhood could hear me. 4 am came around and finally something changed. My waters broke! Water was gushing all over the carpet. Wow, nothing can prepare you for that. What surprised me was that it keeps coming! I thought it would flood out then stop, but no, it kept trickling. I jumped in the shower and we made the call to head back to hospital. Towel between my legs, I waddled to the car. En-route to hospital and I recall saying, “Babe, I’m going to be sick”. Nek minute, vomit after vomit all through my brand-new SEAT. We had it professionally groomed but I actually think there’s still a little reminder on the seat belt. Nothing screams unique like a bit of vomit on the interior.
I walked into the maternity ward with a towel between my legs and vomit all down my front. My midwife said I looked like a drunk person walking into ED. I lay on the bed in the same room as earlier and eagerly waited for my midwife to check what was happening down there. “Anj, you are 3 cm dilated.” WHAT. That whole saga and I’m only 3 cm?! Wow, I was speechless. I remember thinking, I can’t keep going. My midwife said they will get me an epidural and I can get some rest. YES, REST.
About an hour later (an hour that felt like years) the anaesthetist came in and said, “Sorry, I don’t feel comfortable giving you an epidural”. WHAT THE F. Remember that bleeding disorder I mentioned… Yes that’s why. She didn’t want to risk it. I had seen a haematologist prior to labour and she said it was fine. There was a slight increased risk of things turning pear shaped but if I wanted one, I could have one. YEAH, NAH. Wow that moment was so devastating. I could see the devastation on my family’s faces. I think they just wanted the screaming to stop, ha.
I got an IV put in my arm so I could have a Patient Controlled Analgesia (PCA). There was a little green button I could push every two minutes for a quick shot of some sort of fentanyl. It was good, although you had to time things well. A combination of the drugs and the pain make the next few hours a real blur. I remember hearing my mum crunching on some sort of crackers. My sister in law bought snacks – life saver. I recall cold flannels on my head, squeezing Setti’s hand, mum rubbing my back, amongst a few other things.
At 8 am the doctors were going to reconvene and discuss the next steps. I think they were thinking of giving me an epidural because it was dragging out and I was extremely exhausted. Next thing I know I felt like I needed to push. The nurse had a look and said I was 9.5 cm! WOOHOOOOOO. She also said I needed to empty my bladder because there was no space for baby to come through. “Easy!” I thought to myself. NOPE. Getting up off the bed and boom, the most immense pressure on my pelvis. I couldn’t go. The nurse ended up draining my bladder with a catheter.
My midwife arrived back just in time. She was amazing. “Okay everyone, out of the room!”. She told all of the doctors and nurses to give us some space to get this baby out. It became a lot quieter in the room and these urges to push started taking over my body. Setti was holding one leg, my sister-in-law the other. Mum was up near my head sending positive vibes. I was almost going off the back of the bed. 12 minutes later – she was out. Straight onto my chest. I remember the gown getting in the way. I looked down at Setti, he was pretty much on his knees with tears streaming down his face. It’s all a blur really. I was so drained.
The contractions kept coming. I needed to get that placenta out for the pain to go away. Few more pushes and out it came. I thought the pain stopped there but boy I was wrong. Maija needed food so the midwife helped me latch her on. It was so so painful when she latched on! My poor nips. I find it incredible how the bubs just know what to do. Crazy.
Next thing I hear – “I need to check if you need stitches.” GREAT. My midwife had a look and sure enough, second-degree tear. We got that stitched up with the help of the PCA still attached to my arm #winning. I thought that was the end of it and we could get cleaned up but then I hear… “I need to check your anus”. Lord alive.
The first few hours of Maija’s life are all muddled. I was so tired. I don’t think I got to enjoy my baby girl straight away. I was too tired and dazed. I was happy we were both healthy. I had a shower and Setti dressed Maija. All of her clothes were too big! She was only 2.8 kg. Once I finally had a chance to rest at the birthing unit I was able to stare and take in this beautiful human being. I couldn’t believe it. We made her? Wow. Absolutely incredible.
Thanks to my amazing support crew and my incredible midwives, Mel and Georgia, for guiding me and delivering our healthy little girl. A special shout out to my sister-in-law Nicole for snapping some pics throughout the chaos.
